The Corner stone of our
success is the ability to transform our self-image into a positive self- image.
What is self- image?
A very personal image
we develop inside us about us based on very personal experiences and
perceptions, threats and challenges. These images get strengthen by our
internal feedbacks positive or negative and determine our social behaviors,
goals and thrive to achieve those goals, success and failures.
Yes it is true. All of our performance
all of our productivity is based on one fact.
How do we see our-selves?
How do we believe in our
potentials?
How much energy do we have
to pursue our goals?
We set limits for ourselves. With a poor
self-image we may have more boundaries than a person who has high self-image.
Factors play important role in forming our
self- image
Continues Critical
Environment (abusive, rejected, restricted, neglected physically and
psychologically) at any stage of life can distort self- image.
Such criticism forces
the individual to draw negative conclusions all the time. (I am bad, I am
unable to do right things, I am not able to compete with people, situations,
stresses etc.)
One
feels difficulty/ inability to analyze things individually and always look for
approval from others.
Negative self-talk, consciously or
unconsciously repeating the bad experience reinforces the poor negative self- image and brings us
down. Very soon our minds start believing these statements as true, as facts
and our behavior changes according to how we believe.
The way we visualize ourselves, good or
bad, has a direct impact on our performance. Positive self- image means high
productivity and negative self- image means withdrawal, lack of initiatives, resistance
in risk taking, dependency for approval etc. This vicious cycle needs to be
broken for a better and confident living .
With positive self- image world looks great,
open, inviting to meet challenges with fun and for fun. Trust on individual
potentials. Failure is learning. There
is a room for everyone on the earth. This respect and acceptance affects
relationship, productivity, performance and success. This vicious cycle gives
strength to meet challenges with- out getting anxious, paranoid, and exhausted.
Learn to change negative
self- image. Here
are a few tips…
1.
Revisit one of the most important negative experiences
of your life.
·
Visualize the event in detail.
·
Identify
your feelings /response to that event,
·
Identify your interpretations/ meanings /
believes related to the event.
Do it for several time
until the details become very clear and your emotions and feeling related to
experience settle down .
Then focus on the
meanings you have given to the event. List them down.
Change these negative
meanings with some neutral interpretations. Keep this changed interpretation in
mind and revisit the actual experience.
You will be able to
understand that it was the meaning and interpretation which is causing the real
problem for you. Other- wise the event itself has no potential to ruin your
life.
In fact your believes,
negative messages and perception about the event and your coping abilities are
affecting your self-image.
We need to become aware
of our self- limiting beliefs and ask ourselves, how does this way of thinking
benefit me? If it does not, you need to change your belief on something.
2.
. Explore your past for a positive
experience it could be any- thing a hug by mother, play with father, climbing a
tree running with wind, any- thing positive and visualize it in detail,
experience your feelings, the thoughts and meaning associated to those positive
feelings. Repeat that assurance again and again as your strength. This will be
helpful to dissolve the agony of rejection, failure, self- blaming etc. This
will work as positive affirmation.
3.
Positive affirmation is a way to achieve
and believe in self- respect and acceptance. Repeat this statement regularly
and frequently “I forgive others and myself for whatever has happened with me
in past. I accept my-self totally and unconditionally. I love my-self and my
potentials to be happy and successful in my life. I am the only one responsible
for my life, my failures and my success.”
.
4.
Competing
with others means putting your foot in wrong sized shoes. Stop doing it. Learn
to be content and happy with your stuff. Keep working to make it better with
your strengths and limitations.
5.
Believe in that Failure is learning and
Learning is a Key to Success.
.
.
6.
Be
with people. Spend time with old people and young children. Absorb wisdom
and curiosity. Nature is
not in hurry but every- thing settles down with perfection..
7.
Consult for professional help from
psychologist to work on a personal program.
8.
Positive self-image leads to self
–confidence. A strong positive self- image is the
best possible preparation for to success .
.
.
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